Smoking Chief

I just recently found out that the president smokes - cigarettes. Am I just oblivious to the daily happenings of the world and its' most powerful man? Or is it more a matter of I don't give a fuck?

The presidents' PR people must be fucking phenomenal when it comes to keeping that shit quiet. I wonder if there is one secret service agent who is rolling at all times with a pack of Newports and no less than 2 Zippo's?

How many TMZ reporters /camera hacks have been water boarded into giving up their video of the Commander in Chief dragging down 2 packs a day? Harvey Levin probably has a direct line to the white house and gets a sick pay day each time Obama flames up in public.

It would make sense, given tobacco is a gateway substance that Barry is hitting the bong too. And not just any bong, but some solid gold number with his stoned smiling face engraved into the base - probably a gift from the Saudi's along with a huge bindle of their kindest opium for those really hard days when he can't be on the golf course and is actively fucking up the economy.

I also wonder how much a photo of the leader of the free world dragging a dugan and sucking down a 40 out of a brown paper bag is worth? I'll bet the Secret Service has a budget in excess of 5 million to try to maintain this secret - most of which goes to Harvey Levin.

Didn't the first lady initiate a program to keep school kids from getting fat? A program that would keep kids off junk food as well as getting them off of their fat asses to go out and play instead of surfing the net for porn? How's that working out?

All she had to do was teach these fat bastards how to smoke - I mean if it is good enough for the leader of the free world it should be good enough for them, right?

And not the killer kind ganja, oh no - that would be wrong. How would you fit a bong in one of those school lunch bags anyway?  Besides that it would just make them hungry and crave video games. Nope, school kids must stick to smokes, diet cokes, red bulls and interweb porn.

Smoking is not a crime or a sin, unless you are Mormon. If you are going to smoke, smoke. If not quit - but if you will hide a habit as benign as tobacco use, what else is this cat doing behind the oval office doors?